Most essentially, NLP is a communication model.
It is a very refined communication model which reveals the dynamic structures of what we call “thinking.”
And when you know how you create your internal experiences (your inner game), you have many of the keys for transforming your experiences, adding resources, taking control of your self-communications, managing your state, creating emotional intelligence, and modeling the brightest and best.
And with that then winning at the outer game becomes a cinch.
Can a mere “communication model” do all of that?
And if so, how?
How can the communicating discovery do all of that?
The answer is that when we “think” —we are using much more than just our mind.
We are using our full neurology—our brain, our nervous systems, our physiology and this includes our emotions and all of the higher layers of our mind.
So NLP is a systemic model of how we use all of the languages of the mind and all of the neurological processes of the body to create (or map) our sense of reality.
And from our maps come the ways that we explore and navigate the territory of the world.
So as “a highly refined systemic communication model,” NLP gives us the ability to map or model human experiences.
This is what makes NLP a meta discipline above and beyond the mere content of “what” we’re thinking to the context, process, and structure that drives and empowers our thinking. And that’s why you will find so many applications and facets of NLP in this book—personal development, therapy, coaching, parenting, relating, health and fitness, medicine, business, marketing, sales, politics, influence, etc.
Unlike most fields, NLP has no specific content. It is not exclusively about therapy or hypnosis or business or sales or relationships or health or hundreds of other contents and yet it is about all of these.
As a meta-discipline it is a how each of these domains work from a structural or process perspective.
That’s what we call “magic.”
The magic is the structure.
That’s because when you know the structure, you know the leverage points where you can do what otherwise would seem like magic.
This now explains why NLP is a model of change and transformation and so used by therapists, hypnotherapists, managers, leaders, parents, sales people, and anyone in the change business.
NLP puts into the hands of a change agent the leverage tools for change because to change something, you need to know how it works.
When you know how it operates as a dynamic structure, then you also know where to apply resources for transformative change.
This is what brought me into the field of NLP originally.
The first thing I learned in NLP was the structure of a phobia—of a strong negative emotional reaction that over-charged the body with too much fear. The secret? The person with a phobia mentally maps something fearful as a movie (consciously or unconsciously) and then steps into that movie. Doing that is what fills the body full of fear. Then the person’s neurology is fully activated into the fear state.
It makes perfect sense. Regardless of the content of the fear—snakes, small closed places, airplanes, public speaking, etc.—the person is feeling fear and acting out with total aversion behavior because he or she is inside the movie. Well, inside their mind they are inside the movie. So, when a professional communicator can enable the person to step outside of the movie, the phobic reactiveness stops. It is as simple as that; it is as profound as that.
In NLP, we say that structure is the problem and structure is the solution. One structure creates a living hell and reduces resourcefulness; another structure provides relief and enhances a person’s ability to deal with things. And with NLP, you don’t have to explore history, find out “what your mother did to you,” why you are that way, what’s wrong with you, etc. That is content and mostly besides the point. People are not the problem; the frame is the problem. And so new frames are the solutions. That’s the promise and the “magic” of NLP.
Structure explains experience. That’s why if a person, just by thinking about something fearful, can fill his or her body full of fear when there’s nothing present that’s triggering the fear, then the person is doing it. The person, by “thinking” and “emoting” in a certain way, by a particular way of structuring thoughts, is demonstrating a tremendous skill. And if you can do that, you can do many other incredible things. It’s all about finding and replicating the structure or process.
So, as you will discover in this book, there are many facets of the NLP Communication Model that are as “magical” as curing phobia and emotional reactiveness. What is the reason for that? Simply because the NLP model provides you the keys to the structure of experience. Whether it is business competencies, leadership skills, management, coaching, therapy, wealth creation, parenting, health, fitness, sports —if it involves human beings, human experiences, and knowledgeable competence—it involves experience. And structure is the key.
A warning about this. This does not mean that we can do everything in ten minutes. The structure of some experiences involve processes that take days, weeks, months, even years. Yet when you know the structure of that experience, you have a way of accelerating your learning, development, and mastery.
In this book, Kunal Gaurav and Srikanta Kumar Padhi have provided a significant contribution to the field of NLP by putting together this most unique anthology from NLP theorists, writers, and trainers from around the world. If this is your first introduction to the field, then welcome to the adventure of exploring the structure of experiences—especially the highest and best experiences. If you have already entered this domain, then I’m sure this will awaken in you even more of the possibilities we have for adding more richness to our own lives and the lives of those who we touch.